Being Bullied at Work

Being Bullied at Work

I want to talk a little about bullies because bullying often precedes shunning. Shunning is sometimes the direct result of not responding to being bullied. Sometimes, not always, bullies want to see the target’s behavior change. Perhaps, they want to be admired or obeyed and find that the target won’t fall into line. Other times, they’re just mean. They like the feeling that comes of tormenting other people and causing them to quit. It can be just a power trip.

There used to be an excellent resource online for those who were being bullied at work. It was called Bully On Line. It was the work of Tim Field. Unfortunately, he died in 2006. After that, the United Kingdom Workplace Bullying Advice Line published his work and ideas. Then, it was written up in a book called. Bully in sight: How to predict, resist, challenge and combat workplace bullying by Tim Field.

Here is a quote from Tim Field:
“Bullies focus on competence and popularity which at present are not covered by employment legislation.
Bullies seethe with resentment and anger and the conduits for release of this inner anger are jealousy and envy, which explains why bullies pick on employees who are good at their job and popular with people. Being emotionally immature, bullies crave attention and become resentful when others get more attention for their competence and achievements than themselves.”
Here is an amended excerpt from the old website:
“How do you know if you're being bullied? Bullying differs from harassment and assault in that the latter can result from a single incident or small number of incidents - which everybody recognizes as harassment or assault - whereas bullying tends to be an accumulation of many small incidents over a long period of time. Each incident tends to be trivial, and on its own and out of context does not constitute an offence or grounds for disciplinary or grievance action. So,
What is bullying?
· Constant nit-picking, fault-finding and criticism of a trivial nature
· Constant attempts to undermine you and your position, status, worth, value and potential.
· Being isolated and separated from colleagues, excluded from what's going on, marginalized, overruled, ignored, sidelined, frozen out.
· Being humiliated shouted at and threatened, often in front of others.
· Being overloaded with work, or having all your work taken away and replaced with either menial tasks (filing, photocopying, minute taking) or with no work at all.
· Finding that everything you say and do is twisted, distorted and misrepresented
· Being subjected to disciplinary procedures with verbal or written warnings imposed for trivial or fabricated reasons and without proper investigation
· Being coerced into leaving through no fault of your own, constructive dismissal, early or ill-health retirement, etc.”
This is a great description of the behavior of my co-worker before the shunning began in earnest. The principal was sympathetic but was unpopular and had no credibility with the staff. I liked my job and was pretty good at it. I had previously received an award for good teaching. The staff liked me. As time went on, I showed that I was not just competent but super competent. I started to receive recognition at my new school and I think that set my co-worker’s teeth on edge.
It also became clear that my personal life was very successful with a loving husband and children. My co-worker was well off financially and I think I might have appeased her if it was apparent that I needed the job badly. In actual fact, I didn’t need the job at all. It was something I loved to do.
This was, unfortunately, the end of my teaching career. The principal was demoted and sent to a different school in the district. So, a recommendation from her wouldn’t have been worth much. The vice principal was promoted but he didn’t understand my situation at all and seemed to believe I was a social disaster. I couldn’t be fired for cause because I was competent and effective. I was forced by social circumstances to quit and I never applied for another job.